“Today was so hard. I need to blow off some steam with something spicy!”
Have you ever found yourself mindlessly opening a food delivery app on your phone while dragging your exhausted body onto a crowded subway train after work? There are just those days when people scroll idly through their screens and end up adding the spiciest and most stimulating food to their cart to find a little comfort.
The same goes for days when someone gets unfairly scolded by a boss or when absolutely nothing seems to go right. You have probably experienced at least once impulsively paying for an item you normally would have hesitated over, rationalizing it by thinking, “I deserve this much as a gift to myself.”
We often try to soothe our exhausted minds through eating or spending like this. While it might look like an everyday method for relieving stress, psychology views this as a manifestation of emotional eating which falls under the category of “fake hunger” and a reward psychology.
Have you been blaming yourself and wondering why your willpower is so weak every time you see yourself swallowing something or tapping the payment button under stress? You can rest assured. This might not simply be happening because we lack willpower.
Not a Willpower Issue? The Culprit is Cortisol
The Brain’s Crisis Response Manual
Whenever we find ourselves in a stressful situation, our bodies initiate an immediate response as if an emergency alarm has gone off. The element playing the most core role here is the stress hormone called cortisol.
According to research from Harvard Medical School, chronic stress keeps cortisol levels consistently high, and the brain interprets this as a signal that it needs to store energy for survival. As a result, we naturally tend to intensely crave high-fat, high-sugar, and high-calorie foods that can provide instant energy.
In other words, craving a sweet and greasy late-night snack when feeling angry or exhausted is not because your appetite is completely out of control. It can be seen as part of a highly scientific and natural chemical mechanism where a brain sensing a crisis desperately activates a defense mechanism to survive.
(Reference: Harvard Medical School)
The Short-Term Dopamine Trap of Spicy Flavors and Shopping
So why do we specifically seek out food spicy enough to make our lips numb or look for the checkout screen for items we don’t necessarily need? This happens because the brain wants to quickly clear out negative emotions and be rewarded.
Comparing this immediate reward psychology and the mechanism of hormone secretion looks like the table below.
| Category | Mechanism of Action | Chemical Reaction in the Brain | Resulting Feeling |
| Eating spicy food | The brain perceives spiciness as “pain” and activates a defense mechanism | Stimulates endorphin secretion to alleviate pain | Temporary stress relief and pleasure |
| Impulsive shopping | The sense of accomplishment from browsing items and clicking the “pay” button | Secretes dopamine through stimulation of the reward circuit | Satisfaction and anticipation of ownership |
Our brains try to move in a direction that avoids pain and pursues pleasure. When emotional energy is depleted due to stress, the brain often chooses a familiar shortcut to obtain pleasure hormones with relatively little effort. That shortcut is exactly what spicy tteokbokki and overnight delivery shopping are all about.
A Day of Lost Control, Trying to Regain It Through Spending
The Light and Dark Sides of Retail Therapy
In psychology, the act of trying to alleviate negative emotions through shopping is called retail therapy. When feeling like absolutely nothing is going our way in our work life or relationships, we can experience a deep sense of helplessness along with the feeling of losing control over our lives.
At these times, the shopping process of directly choosing what we want from countless products and fully owning it by paying our own money can serve to restore that lost sense of control. However, there are clear pros and cons to this sweet therapy.
Positive aspects of retail therapy (The Light):
- Immediate restoration of a sense of control during the process of making a personal choice
- Temporary relief from depressive feelings through the visual stimulation of new items
- A small sense of comfort and fulfillment of reward psychology by spending on oneself
Negative aspects of retail therapy (The Dark):
- Developing a tolerance that might make you crave greater stimulation and more spending as time goes on
- Guilt and secondary stress that arrive after checking your credit card statement
- A vicious cycle that can repeat because the fundamental cause of your emotions remains unresolved
Statistics from the American Psychological Association (APA) also show that while many people rely on this kind of spending or eating to manage stress, the percentage of those who feel regret or guilt after the act is quite high.
(Reference: American Psychological Association (APA))
Gently Breaking the Vicious Cycle
Naming Your True Feelings
So how can we take a step back from this repeating pattern? The very first thing you might want to try is looking inward to see if the desire welling up inside you is a physical, genuine hunger or necessity, or just a disguise to soothe your emotions.
Right before opening the delivery app, consider gently asking yourself: “Am I really hungry right now, or is it that today was just too exhausting and I need some comfort?”
Simply giving an accurate name to your true inner emotions, such as anxiety, a sense of unfairness, loneliness, or exhaustion, can significantly help in reducing the chances of being swept away by emotions into unconscious actions.
Securing 15 Minutes Between Stimulus and Response
The intense urges triggered by our brain’s reward circuit usually do not last forever. They tend to rush in fiercely like a wave and then gradually subside after a certain amount of time passes.
Before ordering food or clicking the payment button, you might want to try diverting your attention with a different activity for just about 15 minutes. Taking a slow shower with warm water or going for a light walk around the neighborhood while listening to your favorite music are great options.
This brief 15-minute pause can act as a practical buffer zone. It helps calm an excited brain at least a little bit and allows the frontal lobe, which assists with rational judgment, to recognize the situation once again.
Understanding the Brain Helps You Comfort Yourself
Did you perhaps give in last night and eat a spicy late-night snack or make an impulsive purchase? Even if you did, it can be helpful to not blame yourself too harshly.
That behavior likely wasn’t simply because we are weak. It was probably one of the brain’s fierce survival tactics to somehow endure that difficult and grueling day. Understanding the mechanisms of fake hunger and emotional eating becomes an excellent tool for comforting yourself instead of blaming your mind.
Now that you know the principles by which your body and brain seek comfort, how about choosing a slightly gentler method for yourself tonight? We are always rooting for your peaceful and relaxing evenings.
